i always joked about being the fuck up of the family
but i have a feeling my grandmother and aunt and whomever else is going to passive-aggressively congratulate me on graduating
not because they’re proud of me (ha) but because they look down on my sister for dropping out of university and college
tbh my sister needed to drop out. academia was killing her. her year of university was so bad for her mental health. she was drinking constantly. she got stuck in a shitty relationship with a shitty dude.
college seemed better for the first year and a half, but suddenly got really bad this last semester. she’d come home every day crying and/or screaming because of how she was being treated. it was so hard to watch, and i only visited her a couple times during all this.
my family is mostly disappointed because she was “so close”, having dropped out halfway through her final semester before graduating. honestly i don’t think she would have made it. i was considering dropping out around the same time, and really i pretty much did because i haven’t been to class in as many months. she wouldn’t have been able to handle it.
since dropping out she’s been so happy though. she’s been doing so much. she’s actually got direction in her life, rather than sort of drifting along like so many people with depression do. she doesn’t live a day at a time just hoping to get through. she’s motivated. she’s cleaned up and renovated her entire house, and got it on the market. she’s gotten out of her shitty relationship. she’s moving out to calgary with our mother. and she is so happy.
my family is going to be smug about me getting a diploma, because they think that matters. they think it’s more important than her health, and her happiness, but she’s got those. i sacrificed all that to get to this point. i’m so proud of her for prioritizing herself over her grades, for realizing academia is bullshit, and for doing what’s right for her. i wish i had the kind of courage she does, the drive and direction she has.
so many people i know are sort of just floating around lost in post-secondary, unsure of what to do with themselves. Mel figured out what she wanted to do, and she went out and did it. she made sacrifices that she knew would reflect poorly on her in some people’s eyes, but she knew it was worth it because she puts herself first. that’s what’s important.
and i’m gonna tell my family that when they try to rub my diploma in her face.
i’m also gonna tell them my GPA is through the floor.
Many victims of sexual assault do not report these crimes to family, school officials or police, and a new report on the normalization of sexual violence among young girls and women offers several insights into why this is; it also functions as a pretty harrowing primer on rape culture and its consequences.
Researchers at Marquette University analyzed forensic interviews with 100 young people between the ages of 3 and 17, many of whom spoke candidly about their daily experiences of sexual violence and harassment.
According to sociologist Heather Hlavka, many of the young people she interviewed viewed these incidents as a normal part of life. One interview subject told researchers, “They grab you, touch your butt and try to, like, touch you in the front, and run away, but it’s okay, I mean … I never think it’s a big thing because they do it to everyone.”
According to a release on the report, there are several of the reasons why young women do not come forward about the abuse they experience, including a belief that men “can’t help it” and a fear of being labeled a “whore”:
- Girls believe the myth that men can’t help it. The girls interviewed described men as unable to control their sexual desires, often framing men as the sexual aggressors and women as the gatekeepers of sexual activity. They perceived everyday harassment and abuse as normal male behavior, and as something to endure, ignore, or maneuver around.
- Many of the girls said that they didn’t report the incident because they didn’t want to make a “big deal” of their experiences. They doubted if anything outside of forcible heterosexual intercourse counted as an offense or rape.
- Lack of reporting may be linked to trust in authority figures. According to Hlavka, the girls seem to have internalized their position in a male-dominated, sexual context and likely assumed authority figures would also view them as “bad girls” who prompted the assault.
- Hlavka found that girls don’t support other girls when they report sexual violence. The young women expressed fear that they would be labeled as a “whore” or “slut,” or accused of exaggeration or lying by both authority figures and their peers, decreasing their likelihood of reporting sexual abuse.
IT WAS A DIFFERENT TIME
It doesn’t matter if it happened 1,000 years ago or today.
Something horrible is something horrible.
THEY’RE FROM A DIFFERENT TIME
It doesn’t matter if they’re 20 or 200.
Doesn’t change that your relative is a piece of shit.
Stop acting like time frame somehow magically made something ok.
i just checked my marks online and almost had a heart attack because there was a “U” for unsatisfactory, ie failed. then i realized that mark was for the midterm, and that my teacher hadn’t posted the final mark yet. (at the time of the midterm i had missed an assignment worth 25% of my mark, so flunked pretty bad, but i’ve since made it up). okay okay okay i have to stop panicking. i know that i’ve passed all of my classes and that i’m going to graduate.
if you can call them there’s a slight chance the person can/will shut it off for you. I totally would have haha
i’m going to call them today, but they explicitly state that they need 30 days notice. i’m hoping that since i’m still within my billing cycle that they’ll just shut it off, but i dunnnnooo. i’m not too worried either way really
Man, I wish I lived in Canada. Not that it’s easier or anything, but I think I’d probably have been way less stressed out when I was in school
true. before college i never even worried about grades because they were just sort of handed to us. it’s way easier here than like anywhere else really. like it was average to get 80%, which is an A here I believe? i literally never worried about failing for twelve years of my education. there’s actually legislation in place now stating that a student cannot get lower than a 30% so as to protect their GPA. so even if someone never handed anything in nor wrote a test, they’d automatically get 30%.
(i only worry about failing now because i’ve been bedridden with depression and haven’t really gone to class for like 3/4 of this semester)
You need at least 60% to pass in the US, but that’s a really low grade and it fucks up your GPA
yeah, i imagine 50% is like the equivalent. this will fuck my GPA up but like 1. fuck grades 2. i’m done college so idgaf 3. i’m starting my own label so as my own employer, ehhh who cares about GPA
53% is passing? where do you live?
canada. we’re pretty lax. in fact, if i got a failing grade, i could just ask my program coordinator to pass me and he probably would as long as i didn’t fail too horribly.
i mean a 53% falls in the “marginal” category and has a grade point of 1, but anything above a 50 is a pass.